This feels sacred and scary

Feeling exceptionally tired and tapped out of ideas yesterday morning while getting ready to teach my 9:30 am Advanced class, I had nothing at all prepared in the way of asanas, sequence or theme. I didn't feel panicked though as I saw the familiar and friendly faces of the students who came to class. After some thoughtful discussion regarding yoga in social media and some branch-off topics, we got started. I offered them my current home practice; which has evolved into a really reliable and smooth flow that can either be dialed down for slower moving mornings or ramped up for those days when I have extra time and extra energy to play around with, but always does a more than adequate job of preparing me for my day. I felt confident in my instructions even through some tricky transitions and complicated and lengthy combinations because I know this sequence so well in my body on all levels. I felt even meditative while teaching it, automatically dropping into the sensorial flow of it. And although I always am connected and invested in the sequences I teach and absolutely share my experiences of the poses, this felt very different....intimate even. Sitting in siddhasana while the students lay blissfully satisfied in savasana, I was trying to get a hold of what I was feeling. Whether they knew it or not I had made myself completely vulnerable and bare, especially since I knew I had to close this particular class with the small prayer that ends my daily practice and starts my day, in lieu of a meditation practice that I have regrettably been neglecting for some time now. I briefly considered just closing as I always do, with some breath, an 'Om' and a 'Namaste'' but that felt like I would be taking a step backward as a teacher. I remembered the first time I decided to close class by chanting 'Om'; my throat wobbly and shaky with nerves. I now felt remarkably similar preparing to reveal the more sacred part on my personal practice. You'd think I was reading some secretive and juicy diary entry, but really I was simply offering them this:
While seated with hands in Anjali mudra (prayer hands), bow deeply- "in acknowledgment and acceptance that I am here in service..." Sit up straight, press mudra to third eye center "...in my thoughts..." Press mudra to lips "...in my words..." Press mudra to heart center "...in my intentions and actions..." With head bowed slightly, release hands to rest on legs with palms facing up "...I humbly ask for and accept guidance and assistance on this path, in this form..." Lift head, Anjali mudra at heart center "...I am ready" as I blink my eyes open and usually have a goofy smile on my face at this point and offer an enthusiastic "Namaste'"

Ready to move my a(s)sana

It was 6 days ago that I had minor knee surgery (right medial meniscectomy and medial cyst removal). The rest and recuperation time was certainly necessary but I'm so ready to not think about being in pain or what movements might hurt me or injure me anymore. My body and spirit are left unsatisfied by the lack of movement. I did get on my mat a few times for some headstanding (super controlled inverting has to be good for inflammation), core work (because one always should), and altered flow action. But today I hopped on my mat and practiced with near abandon, not to be confused with reckless abandon. I vinyasa'd, I lunged, I warrior'd and man it felt great! It felt great to my body but it was also energizing and encouraging to realize that I don't have to fear my healing knee! Injuries and tweaks happen all the time- I know this all too well lately- but this practice of yoga is one of ultimate healing and should be utilized as such. So long as we stay tuned into our experience and stay clear about our intentions of healing and well being, it's all gonna be good, great in fact!

As if I need extra motivation to get moving forward from here I've committed to 2 yoga challenges on Instagram. One of which is running for the month of September, the other just 10 days. Here are my posts:

 Instagram: @suetomato #moveyoasana (above)
Instagram: @suetomato #aimtruechallenge (below)