On the Friday morning before last I got a text message from my mom at 6:30 am. She knows I am awake at this time but it is not our usual time to chat. Adding to the alarm she wrote, "I have some sad news. Call when you can". I gulped real hard, took a few deep breaths and before calling her prepared to hear that one of my grandparents had passed. Everyday I wait for this shoe to drop since I am a week away from being 30 years old and still have all of my grandparents! My dad's parents are 94! My Gam (dad's mom) verbalizes how tired she is and that she directly asks for the Lord to take her. My mom's parents are younger but not in great health these days. So I thusly prepared for news in this vein but when I called her, she told me that the 23 year old niece of my aunt (by marriage) was brain dead and only hours away from being pronounced officially dead. An aneurysm burst in her brain, at 23. I didn't know what to say I was so unprepared and anyway what is there to say in such circumstances. I had known this girl from family functions, although not well. She was quiet and hung tightly to her sister and cousins.
Needless to say this has drastically shifted my world view and perspective. I wouldn't say that I take existence for granted but definitely life and living life. My theme in teaching for about a week and a half has been based around this tragedy but as a wake up call to live and celebrate the fact that I can move my body and that I am breathing and that I can experience more moments on my timeline. Even the moments that are not awesome I can choose to find some amount of space, time, perhaps even joy. On that mat, these elements are clear. Off the mat, they are easier to ignore and overlook and be lazy about life. But the truth is that we can't! We cannot! We don't have time, or maybe we do...there is
usually tomorrow, but not always.
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| HAPPY and feeling FREE! Spent the weekend with my husband and lovely in -laws on a private lake in the Poconos - LOVE. |
